How I Leave You: the Past

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How come moving on is so hard?

We always make the past, forgotten and broken, shinier than it really was. We look at it through a foggy mirror, seeing only the good and none of the bad. I asked myself this, this morning, lying in bed and wondering what I was going to have for breakfast.

I still don’t know.

Why do we break up but remain friends? Why do we try so hard to do so much, and instead of rewarding ourselves for the effort, we succumb to the mis-belief that we are no longer innocent, we’re not healthy, or something’s wrong, and we need to be fixed. Stop it! Stop it right now!

Get your ass moving, start a fire, inside your heart is an inspirational, motivational, beautiful-beyond-belief woman or man; let it out.

No one is perfect; I’ve been there, trying to make it seem like a movie, this life, making others feel bad or left out because they think that’s how my life is. Because we all try so hard, thinking we have someone to impress, we’re not always represented like our true selves. We tell someone we’re sorry for not being made up, for appearing disheveled, for actually being flawed, or human.

Who do you have to impress? Anyone that doesn’t love you, exactly as you are right now, sitting and reading this, doesn’t deserve a place in your life. Period. Why work towards a future with someone you’re not willing to fix an entire meal for, in your pajamas? Doesn’t that make you pleasant, being a real, accurate depiction of yourself?

Thank yourself; you are who you are. You are who God made you, or whatever it is you believe in. You’re working towards something. Stop taking broken images of the past out of the garbage disposal and move the fuck on. Put the pieces back, let go. Let down your guard, let some guy or girl sweep you off your feet.

Be sloppy, laugh big belly laughs, and follow your heart. Don’t change for someone else; be who you want to be right now. Be you- you’re a miracle, you’re exactly the person you’re meant to be first.

Forgive yourself. Miracles happen everyday- expect them, and invite more miracles in, by letting go of that which no longer has use to you. Leave the past in the trash, and look up- it’s a beautiful day.

Someone, somewhere, is thinking about you. Seek truth. Spread love, beauty and kindness.

and remember, it’s not permanent, none of this is. We’re only here for a little while, so exactly as you are today, shining through tears or punching fists in the air with total clarity and victory, that’s who you’re meant to be- allow yourself a gift, the first one of the New Year; total forgiveness and complete ease of release.

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